Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Bucket Lists and That Sort of Thing.....

A month of so ago, Nancy got us a copy of Jack Nicholson and Morgan Friedman's Film called the "Bucket List". To be honest with all of you, around the first of the year, Nancy and I finished our "Last Wills and Testaments". Man, let me tell you, when I got that done what a relief I felt. I sent a copy to my Sister, DeAnna, and asked her if it looked alright to her, she said, "I don't know, I don't even want to think about it". This was my chance to get the last laugh and say "well you better think about it now....because when I'm dead, it'll be harder for me to get it changed". That is the great relief of having a will, once you've finished it - there's no more arguing. Of course, my recent change in employment status may cause a few adjustments - but those won't take long - then the whole deal is on someone else. The concept of the "Last Living Will and Testament" must have been created by someone who, realizing it was late in the season of life for him, saw the opportunity to dump a whole bunch of shit on other people. What do you bet the creator of this legal document was "William the Wise Ass", hence the name Will?

While on the subject of bucket lists and wills, here's another good one. My sister has been jabbing at me with the Tommy Smother's line "Mom Always Liked You Best" thing. So anyhow, she and I were down at Mom's for Thanksgiving a year or so ago, and Mom has this beautiful octagonal table made of a variety of beautiful handcrafted woods. DeAnna mentioned to me how much she liked it and someday hoped it might be in her home.

Here's how I earn my reputation as a jerk....

I waited until the entire family was around to ask Mom, "Hey Mom, I really love this table, could Nancy and I have it, it would occupy a special place in our home?" This would have launched WW3, except for I couldn't stop laughing. I swear, I believe Mom would have given it to me on the spot. On the other hand, if Mom had of given it to me, I'd have given it to DeAnna, because I knew she loved it more. Still I thought it was funny., So much for my warped sense of humor.

Now back to the bucket list - I did create a few things I wanted to get done before I die. As well as a preambe, and invitations for you to join me in "Getting Let Go" as well as the more fun sport of "Letting Go!"

Nov. 4, 2008

The “Last Bucket List” of
Michael Wayne Roberts
As of November 4, 2008….subject to many changes in the future


I, Michael Wayne Roberts, being of somewhat sound mind and body, do hereby declare that as of this date, May 27, 2008, this is the “Last Bucket List Will of myself, Michael Wayne Roberts. It is valid only until such time as I update it; which I hope will be monthly with new challenges and adventures that I wish to explore with family, old friends, new friends, strangers, or even in some cases, alone. This is not, at this point a legally binding “PTA document” (Pain in The Ass) document. It is living and growing challenge that I will share with close friends and family only. Of course to become a close friend or family member is generally possible at any time. To become a close friend just give me a wink or a nod at the right time. If you desire family membership, I can help in that area as well; since I am an ordained minister in the Church of Universal Ministry. Please keep in mind that my church does not practice polygamy (it’s too hard for mortals to do) nor do we “allow human or animal sacrifice” since it is so messy. By and large, my congregation simply gives thanks for all that has been given us every day by the Grand Architect of the Universe.

If you are reading this, it is probably because I hoping that you will join me on one, or more, of my bucket list adventures. If you don’t see anything of interest, on the current list; stay tuned for upcoming dates….or what the Hell?…..throw in some ideas for the list of your own. If you have this secret list, you probably know that I am a “Gamer” and might try anything you can name with a friend.

To try and ensure that I keep my priorities straight, I have time banded my list into “near term must do’s”, mid term must do’s, and longer term “wanna do’s”. I have also included a “trash bucket list” of things that I gotta get done soon…..just to get them off my mind; and while these are listed last; I consider them a priority; in that, failing to knock them off could delay the really great “must do’s and wanna do’s. As such, in the near term I am going after the “trash bucket list” with a mortal vengeance. If I am successful at these; it can create more room for the need to and want to do’s on the rest of the bucket list.

If my list seems simple to you; I think that is great. I wanted a foundation I could think about and build upon. I hope you will pay close attention to the near term events, because if I live long enough – they will be complete in the next 6 – 12 months. Others take a little more planning, and are potentially even more important / fun. My truest hope is that some of you may find something that interests you, and jump it the bucket with me! If You Think You Are Ready…..Let Me Know, And As I Have Said Before

Let’s Go!!!!!

Last Will and Bucket List for
Michael W. Roberts
May 27, 2008

Near Term (Gotta Do):

1. Go Fishing for “Big Cats” on the Mississippi. (How could we miss this chance?) you can find that one here...and sign up with me...
http://www.bigcatfishing.com/ for some reason...there is some reluctance on the part of some of my friends.

2. Visit Liverpool England. Home of the Beatles.
3. Great big 4th of July Party down in East Texas featuring our band “Diddley Squat” and family. Ray Price? Kenny Falls? Others? Speak-easy? Bring the team! Dance Instruction / Dance contest….
4. Watermelon festival parade with my family. Consider “do-dah parade”. Sponsor statewide melon carving contest! Bring the Team! Randy Moore, Wade Cobb, Tony Cobb….bring em all.
5. Alaska tour with Nancy (I promised and am overdue on this one) in August.
6. Investigate / Instigate Northeast Texas Revival (with Carabeth Lucky etal.
7. Omaha Fall Festival – win the best of show and chili cook-off (CASI). Sponsor successful scarecrow contest!
8. Actively Participate and Make a Scene at Captain Daingerfield Days.

9. Consider Do-Dah Parade.
10. City / County Christmas - things for everyone – make it special

11. Daingerfield Park Celebration and Festival!!!!
12. Could include Sunday Fest and Lunch….
13. Munich at Christmas with Nancy

Slightly Longer Term (Need to Do)

48 State Bike Ride (alone or with bros. / sistas)
Death Valley
Big Bend
Old Faithful
Mount Rushmore
Florist Biker Ride
Memphis World Champ BBQ cook off
Terlingqua Chili World Championship – at least compete
Flower Design Training (CHR) or Texas or Other (Nancy and Mike)
Costa Rica with Big Ike
Mayan Vacation – Tuluum – Chetimzal etc.
Machu Pichu

Longer Term List…..
Well we’ll just have to wait and see how this one plays out after I finish the first list…..

Ideas Welcome....send em all. Please note that I am currently seeking immediate volunteers for my expedition down the Mississippi in serarch of 100 plus pound catfish. If you're game, and don't mind a bit of a gamey smell - get in touch with me soon. I need to book this trip in the next few weeks.

All the best,



  1. You have a serious gift for blogging! As for your bucket list, keep us posted. I think having a full blown schnauzer farm, with oh, about 10-15 schnauzers is a must... Don't you? :)

  2. Hey Mike- I would definately be interested in the catfishing adventure. Let me know what something like that costs to see if I can fit it my budget.